Mothers Day

Motherhood

This morning I woke up and I cried after reading the card Cy gave me. I cried after getting Remi out of her bed this morning and I even shed a few tears later on during the day thinking of how blessed I am to be a mother. Ever since I've been a mother I have felt extremely emotional, I bet that all mothers, well, new mothers at least, after having their first become more emotional as well, but I believe I am extra sensitive and this is why....... When I was younger I would listen to the girls at church say " when I grow up I want to become a mother". When they would say that of course I would agree because I wouldn't want to be different:) but, really I just thought to myself "why would you want to become a mother?" All you would do is cook, clean, take care of other people, and always put your own wants and needs last.(seeing from experience) Why would anyone want to do that? Why wouldn't you want to aspire to become something greater? As I grew up a little bit more I saw my sisters become mothers and I saw them become "different" they became more and more tired :) They would be exhausted as soon as the day began because they had been up all night with a crying baby. We would go shopping and they would always head straight to the baby stores and spend there money there and not on themselves. I then grew up a little more and Cy really wanted a baby, and I wanted whatever he did. I'm not saying that I did not want a baby because I did, but I was not sure about all that came with having a baby. The thought of never having time for myself, the sleepless nights, and not being able to just go out on a date and not worry about anything just really scared me I guess. I know this sounds selfish, but I am just being honest; I wasn't sure I would ever be ready for that. And then I grew up even more and Remi came and my world was literally turned up side down! Having Remi has brought more joy and more happiness in my life then I ever thought was possible. I now fully understand why you would want to become a Mother. I understand why those sleepless night of just holding your baby would become your most treasured moments of your life. I understand how not caring about yourself and how important your life is, to only caring that you have done everything in your power to make sure your little one is safe and healthy. I understand how going into your baby's room in the morning and seeing that cute smile right when she see's you is the greatest moment of the day. I understand how staying in on a Friday night could possible be the most fun you have ever had. I understand how just thinking about your child can bring tears of joy to your eyes. Most of all I understand what it means to be truly happy! I am so grateful to be a mother, and that I have been able to experience the emotions that have come with Motherhood. I hope all of you Mothers out there had a wonderful Mothers Day! You are all amazing women who each and everyday do the greatest calling there is.